


Redemption

by MRHSfan



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Alternate Ending, Episode: s04e05 Expire Erect
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 15:07:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29334285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MRHSfan/pseuds/MRHSfan
Summary: An alternate take on the ending to Season 4, Episode 5 "Expire Erect." What if Chloe admitted her feelings to Lucifer as he lay dying?
Relationships: Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar
Comments: 22
Kudos: 148





	1. Redemption: Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> Well, this bug has been in my ear for a while, so I had to write it down. I wondered what would have happened if Chloe had admitted her guilt for destroying her relationship with Lucifer. What if she opened up to Amenadiel? Would either move save them, or drive them further apart?
> 
> The story picks up in Lux as the hostage siege ends and Chloe throws herself over Lucifer to protect him from a bomb blast.

### Redemption: Part 1

Chloe threw herself on top of Lucifer, anticipating the blast from the bomb. She could feel the warmth and wetness of the blood soaking his shirt as she covered him as much as possible with her body. 

Nothing happened. 

Seconds later, shouting signaled the SWAT team had stormed in, and it was over. She pulled back and looked down at Lucifer. He was pale, and his breathing was shallow. But his eyes were open again, and he had a small smile on his face.

“You OK?” Chloe asked. 

“You landed on my bullet wound,” Lucifer said, his voice weak. “That’s exactly the jolt of blinding pain I needed to bring me round.” 

“I’m sorry,” Chloe said softly. 

“No, Detective,” he said. “You threw yourself onto me. You were willing to sacrifice yourself to save me.” Chloe lowered her eyes, then looked at him and nodded. Of course she was. She would do anything for him…even die for him. But she couldn’t tell him. Not now. Not after…

Lucifer chuckled weakly, and a smile spread across his face as his eyes closed. The ache in Chloe’s heart turned to panic. She lifted her hands to his face, moving it slightly, but he didn’t respond.

“Medic! MEDIC!” she screamed. She looked back at him. He looked as close to death as she had ever seen him, and her heart wrenched. He couldn’t die. He was immortal…except around her. She knew what she had to do. She had to get away from him. But she couldn’t bear to leave him. Not now…not if it was the last time…

Chloe lowered her face to his ear as tears stung her eyes.

“Hang on…please, hang on. Don’t…don’t leave me,” she whispered. Her heart ached at the prospect, and the words flowed out of her before she had a chance to stop them. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Lucifer. I’m…I’m sorry I destroyed us. I’m sorry I destroyed what we might have been. I will regret it for the rest of my life. I will regret never telling you how much I lo…”

“What’s his status?” the paramedic asked, setting down his case and opening it. Chloe pulled back and looked away, trying to blink away her tears. She looked down at Lucifer’s face. It was white, and his eyelids were fluttering as if he was trying desperately to wake but couldn’t. 

“Um…gunshot wound to the abdomen. He’s lost a lot of blood. He just lost consciousness.” She sat back. “I have work to do. I’ll check on him later. Just get him out of here as fast as you can.” 

She thought she hid her tears, but the paramedic noticed as his colleagues joined him. 

“Ma’am, are you OK?” he asked. She nodded.

“He’s…he was…my partner,” she said, her voice cracking. He nodded.

“We’ll take good care of him,” he assured her. She nodded and rose. 

“Thank you. Well, I’ll step away and let you work.” She looked down at him once more, then turned and walked outside.

* * *

“So anyhow, I just, um… I want to make sure you’re OK. And, um, about this being your last case…” Chloe said, trying to fight back the tears. Lucifer was sitting upright on a stretcher waiting to be loaded in an ambulance. Some of his color had returned, and he was alert and staring at her intently. Stepping away from him had been the right call. His celestial immortality was already starting to heal him. The danger for him was over. 

But with that end came the brutal reality of another. Their partnership was at an end. He had said it would be their last case, and now that case was concluded. She would have no reason to see him anymore, to be near him. She might not ever see him again. The thought was ripping her apart inside, but she was trying desperately not to show it — and failing miserably. 

“Well, I just wanted you to know, that I understand how you’re feeling,” she said. 

“And now, I understand how you feel as well, Detective,” he said. Chloe took a deep breath, trying to hold it together. “And, for what it’s worth, I think I’ve gotten my closure.”

“Good,” Chloe nodded and looked away. She couldn’t look at him. She knew she’d break down if she did. She’d beg him not to go, tell him she wanted him to stay…and she knew she couldn’t do that. She had no right to hold onto him. Not after what she’d done.

“For our next case, try not to bring a trigger-happy murderer to one of my parties…it kills the buzz.” 

Chloe stared at him in shock. Our next case? Could it be…?

“You still want to be partners?” she asked hopefully. 

“You know me, Detective,” he said as they began loading him into the back of the ambulance. “Go off and do something dramatic, then realize I’m right were I’m supposed to be.” 

Chloe smiled at him, and he smiled back. She was about to say something more, but she saw Eve come around to the back of the ambulance and climb in beside him. Her smile faded.

“Right where you’re supposed to be,” Chloe whispered. “Just…not beside me. Not anymore.” Her joy evaporated as the pain drowned her again, and she turned and walked away.


	2. Redemption: Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloe and Amenadiel talk after the ordeal in Lux. After finding out Eve isn't evil, Chloe confides in Amenadiel what she thinks of her future with Lucifer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ouch. Lots of angst in that first part, right? I'd like to tell you the angst is over...but can I? You'll have to read to find out. 
> 
> This is a short one,. but there's more to come.

### Redemption: Part 2

Chloe looked to the heavens, tears in her eyes. She smiled for the first time that night at Amenadiel’s words that her father was proud of her. The words from an angel. He really knew. She looked at Amenadiel again.

“Thank you,” she whispered, tears falling again. He nodded and reached out, rubbing her arm in comfort. She looked down and nodded. He was so different from his brother. Her smile faded as she looked up.

“Have you seen Lucifer? Is he doing OK?” she asked. “He seemed to be doing better without me…” Her voice trailed off as she realized what she just said. She chuckled wryly. “Better without me.” Amenadiel look at her solemnly.

“He’s recovering,” he said. “I haven’t seen him, but he texted me. Sounds like he’s headed home tonight.” Chloe nodded.

“Good,” she said. “I’m sure…” she fought back her tears, but her voice shook. “I’m sure Eve will take good care of him tonight.”

“Chloe,” Amenadiel said. She could hear the sympathy in his voice. “Chloe, I know things have been difficult for the two of you, but don’t give up on Luci. He always comes back around.” Chloe shook her head.

“No, not this time,” she said. “It’s my fault. I did this, not Lucifer. I…I didn’t have faith.” She laughs. “Ironic, isn’t it?” 

“Chloe,” Amenadiel said, but Chloe raised her hand. 

“No, it is my fault. I destroyed what we had. I betrayed him. I listened to someone I shouldn’t, and I listened to my mind instead of my heart. I knew better. I knew all those horrible things Father Kinley was saying about Lucifer weren’t true. But I was so confused, so scared, so…” She shook her head. “I should have had faith. I should have listened to my heart.” 

“What does your heart say now?” he asked her softly. She smiled, but the tears poured down her face.

“That I threw away my last chance at happiness,” she said. “That I threw away what we could have….” Her voice trailed off as the tears flowed. 

“Chloe. It’s not too late. Tell him how you feel,” he said. She shook her head. 

“It doesn’t matter,” she said. “I betrayed him. I hurt him. I did to him what everyone else has done his whole life. I was supposed to be different, but I…” She shook her head again as she sobbed. “I didn’t know I made him vulnerable. Kinley said that potion would kill an ordinary man, but just put Lucifer to sleep. But he’s vulnerable around me. If I had done it, if I had gone through with it…I’d have killed him. I’d have killed the man I…” she stopped herself, putting her head in her hands. Amenadiel rose and hugged her to him. comforting her. “I don’t deserve a second chance. He deserves better than me.” She stepped back and looked up at Amenadiel. “What is it your father says? You reap what you sow?”

“Chloe, you don’t really believe that. You don’t believe that you deserve to suffer like this. And what about Lucifer?” he said. 

“I do believe it, because it’s true. And Lucifer…well, he has Eve now. He’ll be fine without me. He’ll be better without me. She accepts him for who he is. I said…I said I didn’t know if I could. I know now I can, but it’s too late.” She held up her hand as he started to speak. “No, Amenadiel. It’s too late. I won’t hurt him again. I can’t. He deserves to be happy. I just have to accept that it won’t be with me. And I do.” She wiped the tears from her face. “I’m sorry, but I’m really tired. Can we talk later? It’s late.” Amenadiel sighed and nodded. He squeezed her arm in comfort, then reached for the door. 

“You know, there’s something else that comes from the words of my father,” Amenadiel said, pausing as he turned the door knob. “If you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.” He smiled at Chloe. “Have faith, Chloe. Nothing is impossible.” He exited the door.

For a moment, Chloe had hope. Could it be true? Could he be right? Could she and Lucifer somehow find their way back to each other? But then the memory came, the one that had turned her dreams to nightmares for the last few weeks. The memory of his face, the tears in his eyes as his hideous devil face melted back to the face she knew so well. 

“Then I have my answer,” he had said, his eyes glistening as he turned his back on her and stared out into the gray night. The pain in his face was unbearable. Her pain was unbearable.

Yes. Three little letters. It was all she had to say then, and they would still have hope. But her uncertainty had been the bullet that shattered the glass, that tore down everything they had, everything they’d shared for nearly three years. 

“Some things are impossible,” she whispered as she wandered to the sofa. She collapsed onto it as the sobs wracked her body.


	3. Redemption: Part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amenadiel confronts Lucifer over his true feelings for Chloe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, the last one was tough. Sorry about that. The next one, well, we get to see brothers being brothers...in a good way. Amenadiel always has his little brother's back. 
> 
> Eve fans...sorry in advance.

### Redemption: Part 3

“Brother, what are you doing here?” Lucifer asked as he gingerly walked around the bar. He was healing rapidly, but his abdomen was still more than a little tender. He reached for a decanter.

“How are you, Luci? Sounds like you had quite an evening,” Amenadiel said, exiting the elevator. Lucifer chuckled.

“You always did have a gift for the understatement, brother,” he said, pouring himself a drink.

“Where’s Eve?” Amenadiel asked. 

“She’s uh…she’s in the shower. Washing off my blood,” he said, taking a long drink.

“Good. I need to talk to you, and I want you to be honest with me,” Amenadiel said. Lucifer lowered his glass.

“I’m always honest. You know that,” he said. "Is this about what happened in Lux? Because I'm fine. Really."

“I hear there was a bomb tonight. That the woman tried to blow the place up. Yet you’re still here,” Amenadiel said.

“Yes. Miss Lopez diffused it just in time, from what I hear,” Lucifer said, a small smile on his face. Pride, it seemed. Amenadiel knew he saw Ella as the little sister he missed having. 

“Thank goodness, or you might have been hurt worse than you were,” Amenadiel said.

“Well, except the Detective…” his voice faded off. Amenadiel saw a hint of a smile, then it disappeared. 

“The Detective did what?” Amenadiel asked. Lucifer furrowed his brow in confusion. 

“She threw herself on top of me,” he said. “It’s a bit fuzzy. I was barely conscious. But I remember searing pain, and I opened my eyes to find her on top of me, protecting me.” He leaned onto the bar, looking more confused. “I was near death. The bomb probably would have finished me off anyway. But she…she didn’t care. She threw herself on top of me. She was willing to sacrifice herself for me. For the devil.”

“And you think that’s odd,” Amenadiel said. 

“Well, yes,” he said. “She could have saved herself. But she didn’t. She apparently didn’t even try.”

“Why do you think that is?” Amenadiel asked. Lucifer shook his head, then gave Amenadiel a withering look.

“What? You have that tone. That sanctimonious tone that says ‘I know more than you do.’ So just spit it out, Amenadiel,” Lucifer said. Amenadiel sighed.

“I probably shouldn’t tell you this, but I can’t stand to see her suffering, even if you can,” Amenadiel said. Lucifer straightened. 

“Suffering?” Lucifer asked, a look of anguish on his face. “The Detective? What do you mean?”

“What do you think I mean, Luci?” Lucifer rolled his eyes. 

“Just bloody SPIT IT OUT,” he said forcefully. 

“Fine,” Amenadiel said. “She’s suffering because she feels guilty. No, she’s wracked with guilt. She hates herself because of it. She feels like she’s being punished for what she did, and she deserved every bit of it. It’s like she’s in her own Hell loop, but she’s still here on Earth.”

Lucifer’s eyes drifted down.

“She feels guilty? She hates herself?” He shook his head. “She can’t keep feeling that. If something happens, if she had died tonight she would have ended up….” He closed his eyes, then looked at Amenadiel. “She doesn’t belong there. She’s destined for the Silver City.” 

“Is she?” Amenadiel asked. “After all, she betrayed you. She hurt you. She lied to you. She rejected you. Maybe she does deserve it. Maybe she deserves everything that’s coming to her.” 

“I never said that!” Lucifer yelled, his eyes briefly flashing red. He took a deep breath to calm a bit. “I never said she should suffer. I never said she should go to Hell. I never said I wanted any of that.” His voice wavered. “Not for her.” He swallowed hard, and Amenadiel saw what he was looking for in Lucifer’s face.

“Why not? You don’t think she deserves to be punished for hurting you? You’ve punished others for less.”

“Not her, though. She’s different. She’s special,” Lucifer said. He finished his drink and poured himself another.

“Yes, she is,” Amenadiel said. “And she’s scared. And devastated. She’s devastated at what she almost did, at hurting and betraying you. But I think most of all, she’s devastated at losing what she thinks was her one chance at happiness.” Lucifer looked up at Amenadiel in shock. “That’s right, Luci. She thought her happiness would be in a future with you. A future she destroyed. A future she thinks can never happen now.” Amenadiel moved closer. “But I think it can, and I think deep down, you do, too.” Lucifer looked at him, a mix of hope and agony on his face. It then hardened. 

“She can’t accept me for who I am,” he said, his voice tight. “How can we have a future when she can’t do that?” 

“Or maybe she can, but she was so scared and confused that she didn’t know what to think at the time,” Amenadiel argued. “Maybe she was still scared and confused about her partner not telling her the truth all these years.”

“I never lied about who I was. I always told her the truth,” Lucifer responded.

“You knew she didn’t believe you,” Amenadiel said. “So why didn’t you show her?” 

“Show her what? My devil face was gone, remember?” 

“But your wings weren’t,” Amenadiel countered. “You could have shown her your wings. So why didn’t you?” Lucifer opened his mouth, then closed it again. Amenadiel smirked. “Because you were afraid, too. You were afraid how she would react.”

“Well, obviously I was justified,” Lucifer said. 

“And you were justified in not saving her from being hurt by Cain?” Lucifer sighed heavily. “Did she deserve that, Luci?” 

“No,” he said softly, taking a drink. “I just thought…she seemed so happy. I thought he could make her happier than I could. But then I realized he was just out to hurt her and I had to stop him. And I realized…” His voice trailed off, but Amenadiel could see the pain in his younger brother’s eyes.

“You realized you wanted to be with her. That you cared about her more than you wanted to admit,” Amenadiel said. Lucifer nodded absentmindedly, taking another drink. Amenadiel grasped his brother’s shoulder. “Luci, don’t you see? You both hurt each other, but you both care about each other. You want each other to be happy.” Lucifer sighed. “Chloe told me tonight that all that mattered was your happiness. That hers didn’t matter anymore. That she wouldn’t be happy again, but she wanted you to be.” Amenadiel let go and straightened. “Sound familiar?”

Lucifer looked at his brother in anguish.

“She said that?” Amenadiel nodded. “But why? I’m the devil. She knows that now. Why would she…?” He trailed off as realization crept into his face. Amenadiel nodded.

“You know why,” he said. “Because despite everything, she still cares for you as much as you care for her.” Lucifer swallowed hard, and his eyes began to glisten. 

“She still cares?” he asked softly. 

“Far more than you know,” Amenadiel said. “But she thinks it doesn’t matter. She thinks she doesn’t deserve you anymore, that she doesn’t deserve to be happy with you. Like I said, she’s in Hell, Luci. And you, the devil himself, are the only one who can pull her out.” Lucifer looked up at Amenadiel. 

“How?” he asked. Amenadiel smiled softly. 

“By giving her the one thing that you’ve always wanted.” Lucifer looked at him with confusion. “Forgiveness. You have to forgive her, brother. And you have to forgive yourself,” he said. Lucifer shook his head slowly. 

“I can’t,” he said softly.

“Yes, you can,” Amenadiel said. “Because I know you, Luci. I know the truth, the one you won’t even admit to yourself. I know you’re suffering, too. That you think she deserves better than you. But the truth is, you deserve each other. You were MADE for each other, remember?” Lucifer looked up at Amenadiel. “You do remember. Maybe we don’t know why, but Father did put her in your path. Maybe he thought you deserved to find happiness again. Or maybe he thought she did. But whatever the reason, you two were meant to be together. Do you really want to throw that away forever?” 

“But she…she rejected me,” he argued. 

“No, you said she said she didn’t know. She told me tonight she knows now, but it’s too late. Do you understand what that means? It means she does accept you, but she thinks now you don’t accept her,” Amenadiels said. Lucifer gripped the edge of the bar table, his breath coming in short pants. 

“She…she accepts me?” he asked, staring ahead of him as his mind whirled. “She can accept me, devil and all?”

“Yes,” Amenadiel said. “So do you really want her to suffer? Do you really want her to go on believing that she deserves to never be happy again?” Lucifer shook his head. “And what about Eve?”

“What about Eve?” Lucifer asked.

“Do you think it’s fair to Eve to give her hope of a future with you when you know your heart belongs to someone else?” Amenadiel said. “Don’t you think you’re lying to her by making her believe?”

“But I thought Chloe and I didn’t have a chance for a future. I thought….I thought there was no hope,” Lucifer said. 

“There’s always hope, brother,” Amenadiel said softly. “So, what do you really want? What does the devil himself truly desire? Redemption and forgiveness, or lies and suffering?” Lucifer looked up at Amenadiel, and a small smile played on his face. 

“Lucifer?” a small voice sounded behind him. Both men turned to see Eve standing in the bedroom doorway, wrapped in Lucifer’s red robe. Lucifer sighed heavily. “What did he mean? What did he mean when he said your heart belongs to someone else? Is that…is that true?” She asked, her doe eyes filling with tears. Lucifer took a deep breath. He didn’t want the words to come out, but he couldn’t lie. Not to her. Not to himself. Not anymore. 

“Yes,” he said slowly. “I’m sorry, Eve. I’m so sorry. I care about you, I do. But…but…” He took another deep breath. “But Amenadiel is right. My heart belongs to someone else. It always has. And tonight I learned it may not be too late to repair what’s been broken. And….I have to try. I’m sorry, Eve, but I have to try.”

“It’s her, isn’t it? Chloe? The Detective?” she asked. Lucifer nodded. A tear rolled down Eve’s face. “I thought so. I could tell. You’re so…connected. She was so in control all night, yet she wouldn’t leave you. She wouldn’t give up on saving you. And I saw her. I saw her throw herself on top of you when she thought the bomb would go off. She was going to save you, even if she died, wasn’t she?” Lucifer nodded. Eve smiled, though her tears continued to roll down her cheeks. Then, she frowned. “But you said she rejected you, that she couldn’t accept you for who you are.” 

“Yes, but I may have been…premature,” Lucifer said. “It appears she can. And I….” He swallowed hard and looked at Eve. “I’m sorry, Eve. I’m so sorry. But the Detective and I…Chloe and I, we have something special. I can’t explain it. I just know that somehow, it’s right. And I can’t give up if there’s a chance…” Eve nodded.

“You’re right, you can’t,” Eve said. “I thought you were the same devil I knew in the Garden. I thought you hadn’t changed. But the truth is, you have changed. You’re not him anymore. You’re different.” Lucifer sighed and opened his mouth to speak, but Eve put her hand up. “It’s OK, Luce. It happens. People change. You’ve changed, I’ve changed. And yes, I care about you, more than you know. But I also care about your happiness, and if your happiness isn’t with me, well…” She looked down, then looked up at him and forced a smile. “Maybe I’ll go somewhere else until I can figure out what will make me happy. Because I’m sure my happiness is out there somewhere, too.” 

Lucifer approached her slowly and smiled.

“I’m sure it is, Eve, and you deserve every bit of it,” he said, reaching out to brush away a tear. He leaned down and kissed her cheek. “Thank you. For understanding, for accepting me, for everything.” She nodded.

“I guess I better go, then,” she said. 

“Take your time,” Lucifer said. He walked up the stairs and into his closet. He came out and walked back into the living area, putting on a sport coat. 

“Where are you going?” Amenadiel asked as Lucifer pressed the elevator button. 

“I have to go deliver something,” Lucifer said. 

“Deliver something? At this hour? Deliver what?” Amenadiel asked. Lucifer smiled as he entered the elevator. He responded with one word as the elevator doors closed.

“Redemption.”


	4. Redemption: Part 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer confronts Chloe about her guilt, and confronts his own feelings for her in the process.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK, so it's been a tough road for our Deckerstar duo so far, but do you think I'd let you down? Lucifer finally works up the courage to say to Chloe what I suspect he wanted to say during the whole Cain/Pierce mess. (We won't even go there...but they do.) 
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy this. Feel free to leave comments. I'd love to hear from you!

###  Redemption: Part 4

Lucifer slowly approached the door to her apartment. He was debating whether to knock or just go in, seeing how it was so late. He assumed the urchin was inside asleep. Should he knock? 

As he neared the door, his celestial hearing kicked in, and he heard an unexpected but unmistakeable sound. Crying. Chloe was crying. His heart seized. He hated hearing her cry, hearing her in so much pain. He knew he was the cause. He took a deep breath and opened the door, walking inside quietly.

Chloe was silhouetted on the sofa by the fire. She was crying quietly, probably trying not to wake Trixie. He walked slowly toward her. She sniffed, pulled out a tissue from the box next to her and stared at the fire. Then a look of pain crossed her face and she buried her face in the tissue and her hands, sobbing. Lucifer’s brow furrowed in pain. He couldn’t bear it anymore. 

“Detective,” he said quietly. She inhaled and looked up, staring at him wide-eyed.

“What….what are you doing here?” she asked. She wiped her face quickly and looked away, trying to compose herself. She looked back at him. “Are you…are you OK?” she asked, staring at his abdomen that had been bloodied and damaged last time she’d seen him.

“I’m OK,” he said. “Bit sore still, but I’m getting there. Well, I was. It’s stopped for now.” Chloe nodded.

“Yeah, because of me,” she said softly. “I make you vulnerable. I hurt you.” She looked down, and other tear escaped. 

“You make me vulnerable,” Lucifer said. “And yes, you’ve hurt me. But clearly, I’ve hurt you, too. I heard you tonight, saying you would always regret destroying us. But you can’t. You can’t hold onto that guilt, or you’ll end up in...” He trailed off, but she nodded. She understood. She’d end up in Hell, tortured by her own guilt for all eternity. He walked forward until he was at the edge of the sofa. “You don’t belong there. You may have hurt me, but I hurt you first. You see, that’s what I do. I hurt the people I care about. I’ve always done it, even though I don’t want to hurt anyone. Especially you.” Chloe looked up at him with uncertainty. 

“But, I’m the one who hurt you,” she said, her voice cracking. “What I did…” She shook her head as a sob escaped. “I don’t know what I was thinking. I was so confused. I never should have listened to him. I knew better. I knew in my heart…” she stopped abruptly. “You’re not what he said, what they’ve all said. You’re a good man.” She looked up at him. He shook his head, tears in his eyes.

“I’m not. I’m not…but…”

“But what?”

“But…I want to be,” he said slowly. “I want to be a better man. For…for you, Detective.” Her breath hitched and her mouth dropped open slowly.

“For me?” she asked. “But…but I thought…”

“See, that’s just it,” he said, the words tumbling out rapidly. “You thought I didn’t want to be around you anymore, that I was pushing you out of my life. And maybe I was, because you hurt me more than anyone else has. Well, except my father. But I don’t lie, I never lie, and I would be lying if I said it was all on you. Because it wasn’t. It was on me.” He was panting now, and he moved closer to her. 

“I should have told you the truth. I should have done it long before I did, but I was afraid, you see,” he said. “I was afraid that you’d abandon me, that you’d run and never want to return. And then, you did, and I thought I’d never see you again. Then you came back, and I tried to shove it in your face because I knew something was off. I tried to make you hate me, make you reject me, even though I didn’t want you to do either, but everyone else had, and I…” He took a deep breath as she stared at him with wide eyes. “I should have just shown you. I didn’t have my devil face, but I had my wings. I should have shown you. I took away your choice, and that’s on me.” 

“You tried to tell me. Right before Charlotte…” her voice trailed off as they both remembered the death of their friend. “You tried, but I didn’t believe you. I didn’t want to believe you. Even though I’ve seen so many things that I couldn’t explain. So many things.” She stopped and looked up at him. “You said you didn’t have your devil face. What did you mean?”

“It disappeared after Mum left,” he said. She looked at him, confused. “My mum was the Goddess of All Creation. She was occupying the body of Charlotte Richards for a while. Charlotte was killed in the hotel. Her soul went to Hell, and my mum escaped from there into her body. But she left at the pier. I sent her to another universe, and Charlotte’s spirit returned to her body. My mum had healed her body, so she could return.”

“That’s why she was so different,” Chloe mused. “But what does that have to do with your devil face?”

“I saved my mum from returning to Hell. Then, I decided I was going to tell you everything. I felt better about myself than I had in ages. So, my wings came back, and my devil face disappeared. I guess I felt more like an angel than a devil.” He swallowed hard. “But then…Cain.” Chloe sucked in a breath.

“You mean Marcus,” she said, shaking her head. “Why didn’t you tell me about him? Why didn’t you tell us he was the Sinnerman? Why did you almost let me marry him?”

“I thought he was only calling himself the Sinnerman to get close to me. He had been cursed by my father, and he wanted to die, and he thought I could help him. Or rather, you could.” Chloe looked confused. “You make me vulnerable. He thought you would do the same for him. And you did, eventually, but only after he fell in love with you.” 

“So…he was immortal, and he fell in love with me, and that made him mortal?” she asked. Lucifer nodded. “But why me? I’m nothing special. I’m a nobody. Why would I make him vulnerable just because he fell in love…” Chloe stopped, and a look of realization crossed her face. She looked up slowly at Lucifer. “He fell in love with me, and I made him vulnerable. So…” Lucifer took a deep breath.

“You were so happy with him. I thought he could make you happier than me, and you deserved better than me. But then he hurt you, and I realized how foolish I was, how wrong. And he hurt you.” He looked in pain. “Then he tried to kill you. He told his men to finish you. So I gave him what he wanted. I killed him. He tried to kill me, and I turned the knife on him. He tried to kill you.” Lucifer shook his head. “I realized I was glad. I was glad he wouldn’t try to hurt you ever again. And that’s when my devil face returned.”

“You were glad he was gone, and you felt guilty about it,” Chloe said. Lucifer nodded, his eyes going to the floor. Chloe took a deep breath. “I’m glad, too. He murdered Charlotte. He tried to murder me. He wanted to murder you. You saved me and yourself. It was self defense.” Lucifer looked at her with hope in his eyes. She returned his look.

“You said he was vulnerable because he fell in love with me,” Chloe said slowly. Lucifer nodded. She paused, but he stayed silent. “I make you vulnerable.” 

Lucifer took a deep breath. Chloe rose slowly from the sofa and walked up to him. 

“I make you vulnerable. Why?” she asked. He was breathing hard.

“I…I don’t know,” he said. “I never have.” 

“So, not for the same reason, then?” she asked, looking into his eyes. He could see the edge of disappointment on her face. He couldn’t lie. Not to her. 

“I don’t know. You’ve made me vulnerable nearly since the beginning. But I…I…I think, maybe I…” his voice trailed off, unable to continue. He looked at her with longing, aching to reach out and touch her, bring her into his arms…kiss her. “But I hurt you,” he said out loud.

“And I hurt you,” she said. “But…you make me vulnerable, too, Lucifer.” She looked at him deeply, willing him to understand the meaning behind her words. He swallowed hard, and she knew he did. “I was vulnerable when Kinley found me. I was scared and confused.”

“Because I’m the devil,” he said. 

“Because you’re the devil,” she said. He hung his head. She took a deep breath. “Because you’re the devil…and I’m in love with you.” His head snapped up, and he stared at her in shock. A tear escaped her already-stained face. “I’m in love with the devil, and it terrifies me, but I don’t want anything more than I want to be with you.” He stared at her, not moving except for his chest that rose and fell rapidly with his breaths. She stood there waiting, but she couldn’t bear it. “Say something, please,” she begged. 

“I…” Lucifer said. He moved his mouth again, then reached out. In an instant, his hands were wrapped around her face and he pulled her to him. He kissed her, inhaling deeply as her scent permeated his body. He kissed her hard, yet his lips were gentle on hers. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her to him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and drowned in the feel of him, his body searing against hers. His kiss deepened, and she opened up to him as his tongue caressed hers. She gripped his hair, lost in his kiss. 

Finally, he pulled away, leaning his forehead against hers. 

“Chloe,” he whispered. 

“Forgive me, please,” she whispered back. He nodded. 

“I forgive you,” he said. “Please, forgive me. Forgive me.” She looked up and stroked his face. 

“I forgive you,” she said softly. A sound between a laugh and a sob exited his throat. He kissed her again, this time with joy. She kissed him back, then pulled away. “But, what about Eve?” He shook his head.

“I told her the truth. I told her my heart belongs to someone else,” he said. 

“But she was your first love,” Chloe said. He smiled. 

“My first love was never Eve. It was you, Chloe. It always has been.” He leaned down and kissed her again. Their kisses grew more passionate until he pulled away again. 

“I should go,” he said. “I should go now, or…”

“I love you,” she whispered, her eyes glistening. “I love you. Please, don’t go.” He smiled and kissed her again.

“Are you sure?” he asked. She nodded. He kissed her once more, slowly, passionately. He stepped back, looked toward the stairs that led to her bedroom, and looked back at her. He held out his hand.

She took it.


End file.
